I am so sick of my parents buying me clothing! Last night they went to the mall and came home with a stupid bathing suit for cats. I know people will buy anything for their pets, but come on, a bathing suit for cats? That’s almost as pathetic as people who pay $200 for a pair of Nikes for their toddler. And besides, what kind of silly company sells bathing suits for kitties? That’s like selling a scratching post for humans; it just doesn’t make sense! Cats don’t go swimming. And even if we did swim, we wouldn’t wear ugly flower-covered shorts when we did!
I love my parents, but sometimes I have to wonder about them. I don’t care how much something costs or how adorable I look in it; I don’t want to wear a dumb bathing suit or any other clothing for that matter. If they wanted to get me a special gift then they could have bought me some new flavors of Fancy Feast. But no, they decide to buy me this multicolored polyester monstrosity and parade me around in it for their own amusement! I swear, as soon as they leave me alone with this thing I’m going to rip it up worse than Wolverine in those X-MEN movies.
If you have a kitty and you think they’d look cute in a bathing suit or wearing a wool sweater then you need to have your head examined. We do not like wearing this stuff! We were born naked and that’s how we want to be! Do you even know how uncomfortable polyester is for cats? If Roger saw me wearing this he would never talk to me again!